Just a Little Crush (Crush #1) Page 5
Ryder glanced over his shoulder. He studied me, exhaled a big breath then faced me. With a gentle tug of my hand, he pulled me against his chest and brushed his lips over mine. “I’m not going to make you do anything you don’t want to do.” He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and glided his finger down my jaw. “In fact, I’m not even going to do all the things I want to do. But I do want to kiss you, and I think you want to kiss me too.”
Though I would never publicly admit it, I’d replayed our first kiss countless times over the last four years. And now I was actually being given the opportunity to relive it? Heck yeah, I wanted to kiss him. But everything about this situation had me going crazy. My heart pounded so hard it would surely explode. I didn’t have that much experience with guys and he seemed to have more experience than necessary with girls. The right thing to do was run but he made me want to do wrong things. He made bad choices look good.
“I’ve endured two hours of waiting for them to pass out just to get this chance. If you want to leave, I understand, but if you stay, I fully intend to kiss you. Your choice.” His lips swept over mine again. “But you need to make a decision quick because your mouth is too perfect not to kiss. If you don’t walk out of my suite right now, I won’t be able to stop.”
I should leave. Just turn around and pretend none of this ever happened. But then Ryder’s mouth covered mine, taking every bit of my argument with it.
He pulled me into his room, never breaking our kiss, and closed the door. My back pressed against the wall as he slid his hands down my body. His tongue tangled with mine.
He brought one hand to my face and ran his thumb against my cheek while sliding his fingers into my hair. He worked his other hand under my shirt and up my ribs then grazed his thumb over my satin bra.
A moan escaped my mouth, heating my face with embarrassment. I wanted to pull away, but he only seemed more encouraged. His thumb made small circles and my knees weakened. He pressed his thigh between my legs and another moan slipped out. Shit. What was he doing to me?
His hands went to my thighs as he wrapped my legs around him and carried me to his bed. The thick comforter padded my back as he settled over me. Heat radiated off his body and every inch of me longed for him to come crashing down.
“Nothing but kissing. I promise.”
I nodded, while secretly hoping he broke promises.
His mouth returned to mine and he nibbled my bottom lip before slipping his tongue past.
I lifted my hand and tentatively skimmed my fingers over his neck. He deepened the kiss and my grip tightened. The metal ring contrasted with his soft, full bottom lip. It was so incredibly sexy I couldn’t stop myself from running my tongue along it again and biting down.
He groaned and lowered his body. The hardness pressing through his jeans triggered my moan. He tensed and there was a good chance I’d die from embarrassment. He was probably waiting for me to run, like I’d done four years ago.
Ryder shifted a little and pressed into me again, sending my head spinning. I gripped his back and my hips bucked slightly.
“Brinley.” My name came out like a plea as he repeated the motion.
The way his mouth caressed my name made me desperate to feel his lips. I pushed my tongue into his mouth, wanting him to devour me.
He broke the kiss and pressed his forehead to mine. His chest expanded as he took two deep breaths. “Ruined,” he whispered.
Was he worried he’d ruin me? If that was supposed to scare me, it did the complete opposite.
He lowered his mouth to my neck and sucked with gentle pressure then ran his tongue over the tender spot. He alternated between pressing kisses into my neck and exploring my mouth with his tongue.
We lay like that, kissing, groping, exploring, for what seemed like an eternity yet it’d never be enough. My lips were tender and swollen but I wanted more of him. I couldn’t get enough—and given the way he kissed me, it seemed he felt the same way. Heat pooled in my stomach, spread into my fingers and toes. My belly tightened and sounds beyond my control escaped my lips.
He nipped at my earlobe and whispered, “Come for me.”
A wall slammed down.
Everything came into focus. His grip on my waist. My hips rocking against him as he pressed into me, grinding our bodies together. My ragged breathing. The building sensations. Holy shit. I was about to, and we weren’t even anywhere near having sex.
I shoved Ryder off. “I’ve got to go,” I mumbled, and darted from his room. Like I was fifteen all over again, embarrassment was the only thing forcing my legs to move.
I rushed through the living room, past a sleeping Noah, and opened the door.
“Brinley, wait.”
My throat was dry and some stupid part of me was all choked up. I flew into the hallway, never glancing back. I had to get away.
Thankfully, there weren’t any pools to fall into this time.
—
The next day in class I popped two ibuprofen and washed them down with a healthy dose of caffeine. While Cassidy and Noah probably nursed beer hangovers, I nursed a Ryder hangover.
After rushing from his place the previous night, I lay in bed unable to sleep, and wound up in more ways than one. Not only was my entire body still flaming from memories of his touch, my head spun with questions. He could have any girl he wanted, why did he decide to pursue me last night? He’d always been confident in high school—bordering on cocky—and went after what he wanted, but he’d never spared me a glance. Had he?
Dammit. Why did I even let him kiss me? I never had a problem saying no to guys, so why had I been so freaking willing with him? But, of course, I knew the answer to that one already. No matter how much I claimed to hate him, a part of me had always wanted Ryder. And since he’d been away at college, he’d grown his hair out, pierced his lip and defied logic by becoming even more irresistible. It really wasn’t fair that one guy should house that much—well, everything. He oozed sexy. From his annoying little I-know-a-secret smirk to his I’m-mentally-undressing-you green eyes, he had me wound so tight I wanted to burst. Hell, I almost had.
Oh God.
My face heated and I tucked my chin down. Just kissing the guy had me practically screaming his name.
Noah had to be avoided from now on, but I wasn’t sure how to manage that since we had Art History together three days a week. No way could we ever hang out again. What if Ryder had told him something? Would Ryder share that with Noah? What if they’d had a good laugh about it this morning? My stomach knotted.
When class let out, I took a shortcut to my dorm to avoid the crowds. The trees shaded the walkway and I tugged my hoodie closed. The days still teetered between the bite of winter winds and the warmth of spring sunshine.
“Hey.” Fallon appeared in front of me, her blond hair pulled into a messy bun. She looked like she’d just stumbled out of bed, not class.
“Hey.” I glanced around. “Where did you come from?”
“Main exit is closed. Maintenance, so we had to use side exits.” She pointed over her shoulder to a stairwell that sunk into the ground. “Have you talked to Mason for me yet?”
I hadn’t. It wasn’t intentional—although I didn’t especially want to talk to him about her—I really had forgotten. “I’ll tell him when he gets out of class.”
Fallon crossed her arms.
“Really, I will.” The door behind her opened with a flood of people.
“Fine.” She pulled her hair loose, retwisted the bun and clipped it. “Just remember, I came through on my end and I expect you to do the same.”
“I know.”
She turned to leave as the door swung open again and a few more people emerged, but only one mattered.
Ryder.
Before I could flee, he made eye contact.
I latched onto Fallon’s arm. “I’ll walk with you.”
She stared at my fingers. “Why?”
“Please. I’ll explain later. Just act like we’re
busy talking and walk with me.”
She glanced around. “What has you so worked up?” Her gaze locked onto the spot where Ryder climbed the stairs. “No way.” She laughed.
“Please,” I whispered as he turned in my direction.
“He’s coming this way.” Her face scrunched. “Oh, this is too good.” She turned to completely face him. “Hi.”
Ryder’s gaze flicked in her direction as he nodded a hello. Then he asked me, “Can I talk to you?”
My throat dried as I choked a response, “Uh, I’m, um, can’t be late.”
“I thought you were done with classes,” Fallon asked with a wide-eyed blink. “Oh, unless you were on your way to talk to Mason and can’t be late for that.” She smiled.
I glared, glanced at Ryder, then said, “Yeah. That’s what I meant.”
“It won’t take long,” he said.
“Did you still want me to walk with you to see Mason?” Fallon asked.
“Yeah,” I muttered, hating the way Ryder’s gaze did me in.
“Give us a second.” Ryder grabbed my hand and pulled me away from Fallon. Once we were out of earshot he said, “I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I pushed things too far and I know I said I wouldn’t. I didn’t mean to break my promise, it’s just…” His gaze dipped over me. He shook his head. “It won’t happen again.”
It wouldn’t? That was the right thing, for both of us, but also the most depressing thing I’d ever heard.
He studied me, staring deep into my eyes, then his gaze dropped to my lips and flicked back to my eyes. “Unless…”
My body weakened and tingled with anticipation.
“You…” He shook his head. “I won’t fuck up.”
I nodded slightly as if agreeing with his statement while internally protesting.
He started walking away but paused. “Do me a favor?”
I nodded like he could ask for anything and I’d say yes.
“Stay away from Noah.”
I had imagined a million sexy things he could have said right then but that definitely wasn’t one of them. He sounded defensive or overprotective and it ticked me off. I wasn’t chasing Noah; he was the one pursuing me. “We’re just friends. I’m not going to hurt the guy.”
He scrunched his eyebrows. “No, but if he touches you, I will.”
Speechless, I stared at Ryder as he left me standing on the sidewalk.
“Holy shit. What was that about?” Fallon asked.
I’d forgotten she was even there. “Nothing.”
“That guy looked like he wanted to eat you up.” She glanced back at where he’d gone.
I rolled my eyes and started walking in the opposite direction. “No he didn’t.”
“Hey, I’m as surprised as you. That’s the guy who came to our room the other morning, right?”
“Yeah.” I kept walking, wishing I hadn’t asked her to stay with me.
“Well, let me be the first to congratulate you on what looks like one incredible fuck.”
My face burned. “Shh. We aren’t hooking up. He just wanted to talk.”
“Talk? About all the nasty things he wants to do to you?”
“No. Be quiet.”
“I bet you he’s packing some serious—”
“Fallon!”
She grinned. “Man meat.”
“Oh my God, you did not just say that.”
“I’m screwing with you. Geez, lighten up. The guy wanted to fuck you six ways to Sunday. You should be rejoicing, not sulking. Have some fun.” She nudged me with her shoulder and wiggled her eyebrows.
“Do you really think he likes me?” Since I could never ask Mason, Fallon would have to do as my female friend for the moment.
“Like you? Dunno. Want to bend you over a table? Absolutely.”
I slapped my hand over my mouth to stop a laugh from escaping.
“You won’t be walking right for days.”
Laughter burst from me.
“Thank you! Finally, the girl can have a good time.” She grinned. “And I’m not kidding. That boy wants to practice making babies with you.”
—
Mason’s dorm room was identical to mine. Small, two twin beds and matching desks built into the walls, but it was ten times cleaner. Thanks to Fallon, half of my room appeared perpetually tornado ransacked. Hanging with Mason in his room was a nice change.
I kicked my flip-flops off and pulled my knees to my chest.
Mason sprawled next to me, his head propped on a pillow. His legs, which almost hung off the end of the tiny bed, were crossed at the ankle.
“How was work?” I asked.
He rolled his eyes and grumbled about the students who used the computer lab, compatibility issues and a whole bunch of other stuff I didn’t understand. Being that he was a computer science major, he was always frustrated by questions he found dumb. I tried to be supportive by letting him vent, but I also enjoyed giving him a hard time about it.
I stared blankly at him. “I’m sorry, you’re speaking nerd again.”
“You’re hilarious. Considering you’re fluent in it.” He made his voice girly. “Did you hear about the nucleotide enzymatic compound synthesis?”
I bit back my smile. “That doesn’t even make sense. And I don’t sound like that. But I am impressed you remembered all that from Biology.”
“You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to use all those words in one sentence.”
I laughed as he grinned proudly.
“So what was it you wanted to tell me?” he asked.
“Okay, don’t kill me, but I have to pass this info on to you.”
“What?”
“Fallon wants you.”
“Oh, that. Who doesn’t?”
I nudged him. “Seriously. She did me a favor and so, in return, I need to tell you…I’m okay with y’all sleeping together.”
He sat upright. “Hold up. I know you think I’m a man-whore, but really? You think I’d just sleep with anyone?”
“Kind of.”
Mason twisted his face, looking genuinely insulted.
“I’m kidding. Look, I don’t want you sleeping with her because she’s a super-slut, but she believes the only thing holding you back is me. For the record, if you are not sleeping with her because you think I’ll be mad, then don’t let that stop you.”
“So you wouldn’t be mad?”
“I don’t know. Not mad, I guess. I just don’t think I could stand losing my best friend to her.”
He chuckled. “You would never lose me to her. She’s not really girlfriend material, you know.”
“She’s not that bad.”
He raised an eyebrow. “We are talking about your roommate, right?”
“Yes, okay, she can be a little overly social in the boy department, but she’s funny too.”
“Well, thanks for your stamp of approval, but I’m not interested in your roommate.” He lay back down. “So why do you owe her a favor?”
I shifted my legs and rested my chin on my knees. “She just checked up on me.”
“What aren’t you telling me?”
Mason knew how much I supposedly hated Ryder but he also knew I lacked experience. Ryder wasn’t the type of guy girls like me dated and he’d have something to say about it.
“Brinley.”
“Did you know Noah and Ryder are roommates?”
“No, and what does that have to do with Fallon?”
“Noah and I planned a dinner date, as friends.”
Mason sat upright again. “When was this?”
“Last night. He’d helped me with some homework and I said we could do dinner as friends.”
“Why the hell didn’t I hear about any of this?” Mason’s eyebrows slanted over his eyes as he studied me.
“I wasn’t hiding it. I just, I dunno, didn’t mention it.” I shrugged as he stood and walked over to his desk. He leaned against it as I finished. “Well, I went to his suite to meet him and found Ryder. He to
ld me he lived there—we ended up all hanging out.”
“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.” Mason tapped his fingers along the edge of the desk. “Do you like him?”
My face burned. No way could I talk about Ryder with Mason in that way.
“Seriously? You do.” He shook his head. “I thought you said you weren’t interested in Noah.”
“Wait. Noah? No, I’m not interested in him.”
Mason pushed his sleeves up and crossed his arms. “I don’t understand. Then what ar—” His eyes widened. “Ryder. No fucking way. Please tell me you do not like him.”
I remained quiet.
“Brinley?” He stared into my eyes. “Please tell me you don’t like Ryder.”
“I don’t know,” I whispered. Which was the truth. I was definitely attracted to him, but liking him seemed premature. Of course, did a part of me want to get know him a whole lot better? Absolutely.
With a slow blink, Mason turned away and stared out his dorm window. “He’s going to fuck you over. You know he will.”
“You don’t know that.” It was a defensive knee-jerk reaction to contradict him because, honestly, even I couldn’t be sure of it.
He laughed humorlessly. “Really? Since when did Ryder become anything more than an asshole? For three years, he saw you every day at school, and how many times did he actually try to apologize for being a jerk to you at that party? You were basically invisible to him. Granted, it was probably hard for him to see past his gigantic ego, so you know, maybe I should cut him some slack.”
His words oozed sarcasm, and the chastising way he looked at me made me feel like an idiot. I chewed on the inside of my cheek, hating that he was right.
“Come on, Brinley, up until the other night, the guy forgot you even existed.” He gestured toward my body, which had developed later than most girls’, but, as Mason liked to point out, had made up for lost time. “It’s convenient that now he notices you.”
I stood and crossed my arms. “You’re making a big deal out of nothing. So what if I have a little crush? It’s not like he’s interested in me. Just forget I said anything.”
“Not interested? Please. Not only are you beautiful, you’re so goddamn sweet and innocent…Dammit, Brinley, to a guy like Ryder, you’re a fucking wet dream come true.”