Addicted to You Read online

  Oh god, he must be wasted if he thought that was sexy. Could I kiss a drunk Colby and not be riddled with guilt in the morning?

  I almost laughed out loud. Like there were any conditions in which I wouldn’t kiss him. And guilt? Yeah, right—I’d waited for almost ten years to get this chance. I’d earned it. Guilt-free.

  As he neared, I became more convinced he was actually going to pass me by, mumbling something about needing to take a leak, and not because he didn’t look like he wanted to kiss me, but because I knew I couldn’t be so lucky.

  But then he stopped, a few feet short of fulfilling my wildest dreams. Not close enough for a kiss, yet not far enough away, because behind the whirlwind of questions, doubt, and disbelief lingered that overwhelming desire to tug him to me.

  And then everything just…happened. Maybe I moved or he leaned in, but somehow the gap between us vanished. He pressed both hands onto the table, while I perched on the edge of my seat, and our mouths came together in one hell of a lust-filled kiss.

  But was this really happening? It wasn’t like I hadn’t fantasized about this a million times before. It was quite possible I’d slipped into another wonderful daydream, except this time it felt real. Which was even better than I had imagined.

  My arms slipped around his neck as his tongue worked past my lips in a move so perfect, you’d think we’d done this a million times before. There was no thinking, or planning what should come next; it just flowed from us like our mouths belonged together. And as far as I was concerned, they did.

  Then I was in motion. Lifted from the chair, so he could occupy it, before being settled back down in his lap. Except I wasn’t draped sweetly across it. No, I was straddling him, and I was pretty sure he’d been the one who situated my body like that. Of course, I might have had a little part in that decision, but the best part was how right it felt. Natural, as our bodies molded together.

  His arms slipped around my waist, our mouths moved together, and his hand slid under my shirt then slowly grazed up my spine. Warmth trickled through my body in anticipation as his fingers toyed with the clasp of my bra. But then his hand glided back down and rested on the small of my back. Though the slight hesitation and change of course disappointed me, Colby was still kissing me. And really, what more could I want?

  His trademark baseball cap, which had always been part of my fantasy, was just getting in the way. So I flicked it off his head, and threaded my fingers through his overgrown hair. He groaned into the kiss, causing heat to flare between my thighs and encouraging me to drag my nails along the back of his neck. And to my surprise, it earned me a nip on my bottom lip. An incredibly hot little bite that drove me even wilder. At least, when later questioned about my actions, that would be my defense for insanity.

  Tilting my head to deepen the kiss, I pressed my body flush against his, rocking my hips ever so slightly, and his grip tightened, his arousal apparent between my legs. I repeated the motion, slow and deliberate, hoping…no, needing him to know how badly I wanted this with him.

  “Isla,” he murmured, and my heart sank.

  He was going to stop. The reality of what this would do to our friendship was outweighing this incredibly sexy moment. For him. Obviously not me.

  “Bedroom?” he mumbled against my lips.

  Wait, what?

  I didn’t even have to think about my response because my head was already bobbing my consent. He wrapped his arms around my waist and stood, just as the back pocket of my shorts started ringing.

  We spoke in almost unison.

  “Grandma.”

  And that very sobering thought was like an emergency shut-off button. He lowered me to the ground and I fished my phone out.

  “Hello.”

  “Hola mijita.” Though she spoke fluent English, Grandma always allowed her native language to slip out when talking with me. “Are you at home?”

  “No, I’m at Colby’s.”

  “Ay bueno.” Her relief was audible. “I didn’t want to drive in this rain but didn’t want you home alone either. Do you think you could just stay there?”

  “Stay here? Like overnight?”

  “Si. The rain is so bad.”

  I glanced at Colby. Did I want to stay the night? Absolutely. But would that be super awkward now?

  “The weather will probably clear up—”

  Colby sighed and grabbed the phone. “Hi, Ms. Diaz. Isla can of course stay the night. She shouldn’t be driving through a storm.” He smiled then laughed. “Yes, ma’am.” He nodded as if she could see him. “Okay, here she is.”

  “I like that boy. You should marry him.”

  “Grandma!”

  She chuckled. “Okay, be safe.”

  My face warmed because though I knew she worried about the storm, “be safe” suddenly had a whole new meaning.

  “I will.”

  “Te amo.”

  “Love you too.”

  “Bueno. Bye.”

  I hung up the phone and slid it back into my pocket, not really sure what to do with myself now. Our moment had come to an abrupt halt, yet I was here for the night. Did we pretend it never happened, or pick back up where we left off? I kind of hoped for the latter.

  When I finally found the courage to glance up, Colby was watching me. He didn’t look quite as confused as I felt, but he did seem to be lost in some sort of thought.

  But then his expression cleared. He reached out, grabbed my hand, and silently led me down the hall, directly toward his bedroom.

  This was it. The moment I’d been waiting for. The moment Colby would be all mine. Even if it was only for one night.

  Chapter 2

  This was happening. Whatever this was…

  Maybe I was getting ahead of myself. Were we going to have sex? Just kiss? Hell, maybe he wanted to talk. Though that didn’t seem likely. Based on the way he’d eyed me when I stepped into his room, it seemed pretty safe to say that if I was willing, there would be a lot more than talking going on, and while that should have terrified me, it didn’t because everything just felt right, from the second we first kissed to the moment I followed him down the hallway.

  The door clicked softly as he shut it.

  I glanced around the room, eyes flitting from the bed to him then back to the bed. Should I sit? Lie? Let him decide?

  Oh, this was stupid. It wasn’t like I’d never done this before. I had to make a move or he may get the wrong idea and nix it all together. Last thing I needed was to lose this one chance because I was too busy trying to decide if I should sit on his damn bed.

  With my hand still in his, I sat on the edge and gently tugged him closer, which seemed to be all the invitation he needed.

  His free hand moved through my hair, twirling a thick strand. As he came to the bottom he brushed his thumb along my collarbone.

  “Isla…” His voice was practically a whisper, almost a question. “You—”

  And again I knew I needed to clear his doubts along with the space between us. I tilted my head up in invitation and urged him forward. As our lips met, he pressed his knee onto the mattress while I lowered myself fully onto his bed. He followed, never breaking the kiss, and angled his body over mine.

  But still something was off. Physically he was present. His lips, hands, everything showing his want and need, but mentally…well I wasn’t sure where he was. Since I’d made it clear I was more than willing to see where this went, the only hesitation I could imagine he’d have was the big then what? So we fool around. Maybe even have sex…then what? Was he scared I’d want a relationship? Which yes, obviously I did, but I’d gladly settle for only one night. Was he worried it’d be weird or awkward between us? And while that was a possibility, I needed Colby in my life as a friend more than anything else, so no way would I jeopardize that. So even if it killed me on the inside, I’d be Colby’s one-night, one-time friend with benefits. Now to convince him of that…even if I hadn’t truly convinced myself.

  I pulled back slig
htly and smiled. “Colby, we’ve been drinking. We’ve flirted. We’re kissing. It doesn’t have to be a big deal. We’ll still be friends in the morning.”

  He stared down at me for what felt like an eternity. Like I’d asked him the meaning of life and he was formulating his response. Like a billion wheels were turning in his head and whatever he did next would seal the fate of the entire universe and, holy shit, I just wanted one freaking night with him. Was that so hard to give me?

  With a deep breath, I settled into the blankets, the down comforter molding around me, and stared up at him, willing him to stop thinking and just act. Willing all that tension knotting his shoulders to disappear as he gazed down on me.

  And then something changed. Actually everything changed. Gone was the thoughtfulness in his eyes, replaced by what could only be described as hunger. The tension no longer seemed to be fueled by worry or doubt, but instead by something almost primal needing to be held back.

  He settled over me, his body fitting snugly against mine but still supported by his leg and elbow. But damn, if I wasn’t going to figure out what was behind that look. I shifted, intentionally bumping my leg into his, forcing the full weight of his body onto mine. With one last quick maneuver, I positioned my thighs against his hips.

  He groaned as he settled right between my legs and, suddenly, as if everything else was forgotten, his mouth came down hard on mine while his hand reached under my shirt, grabbed my hip, and tugged me against him as he rolled onto his back.

  I followed, in one easy move, never breaking our kiss. And then we were moving, almost frantic. Clothes needing to come off.

  He made quick work of removing my shirt, then unsnapped the button on my shorts, but our arms tangled as I tugged at his shirt, trying to force it over his shoulders. We finally gave up and he yanked his own shirt off while I shimmied out of my shorts.

  But then he paused, his gaze slowly skimming down my body, tracing every curve from my breasts to my hips. My skin warmed as a flush worked its way over my chest and into my face. I’d been naked with other guys, but there was just something about being stared at by the guy you loved, who also happened to be your best friend, to really make you feel naked.

  “Stop looking at me like that.” I attempted a laugh to play off the embarrassment.

  His gaze lifted back to my face. “You’re gorgeous.”

  I rolled my eyes, knowing he’d never say otherwise and probably just wanted to make me feel good about lying naked underneath him.

  “You don’t have to say nice things. I’m already in bed with you,” I teased.

  “I’m serious, you’re stun—”

  Ready to end this conversation before it reminded either one of us we were Colby and Isla and this might not be the best idea, I lowered my body flush against his and placed a light kiss on his lips. “It’s just me, Colby. We don’t have to pretend,” I whispered. Then before he could object, I deepened the kiss.

  My legs went on either side of him, knees pressing into the mattress as I slowly rocked against him. My hand slid over his stomach, making its way to his shorts. With a tug, the button snapped open, and my fingers grazed over him as I eased his zipper down.

  And then he made this incredibly sexy sound that was somewhere between a groan and a moan, as if something felt amazing but was also a tiny bit of torture. My gaze shot up, curious as to what expression accompanied such a sound, but also to double-check that I hadn’t actually hurt him in any way.

  As soon as our eyes met, his hand was in my hair, yanking me forward, urging my mouth back toward his. The kiss was slow at first, as if he savored every brush of our lips, every taste of my tongue. And damn if it wasn’t perfect. Nothing about this moment was worth rushing. No matter how bad I wanted him to flip me back onto the bed and rip off my lacy black panties, I relished his unhurried pace. Until it became unbearable. The slow sensual tension pooled in my belly and trickled down my body, begging for something more. Relief from the agony of desire.

  I deepened the kiss, rolling my tongue along his as my hand moved down his body again and into his shorts.

  With a sharp intake of breath, he stifled a groan. One hand dug into my hip like he clung to some tiny bit of self-control. Not sure what it would take to finally chip away that remaining bit, I tried the one thing that always seemed to drive guys wild. I kissed my way up his neck, along his jaw, and then brought my lips close to his ear. My tongue flicked out, gently teasing at his earlobe as I released a soft sigh, then finished in a quiet moan.

  And it did the trick.

  He reached up, unsnapped the tiny clasps at the center of my back, then flipped me onto the bed, removing my bra in the process. And without delay, I was against the mattress as he tugged my panties, but then hesitated about halfway down.

  He looked up, almost guilty for getting lost in the moment.

  And I knew it was up to me. I finished what he started by yanking them off and tossing the strip of lace to the floor. Then reached for him.

  Unfortunately, he did that thing again. The one where in the heat of the moment he looked at me like Isla…his friend. His naked friend who might need a confidence boost.

  “You’re staring.”

  “You’re beautiful.”

  “Okay. Okay.” I half laughed again. “It’s just me.” And since the moment had already been slightly derailed, we might as well get it back on track with the ever-important…“Do you have, uh, you know?”

  “Oh yeah, of course.” He reached into his drawer and pulled out a condom.

  And reality came crashing down on me. Colby and I were about to have sex. My Colby. My best friend. The guy who meant the world to me. The one I loved.

  And as these thoughts ran through my head, it occurred to me Colby might be having a few of his own. He didn’t make a move. He just looked at me. And I knew I was losing him again. The momentum was trickling to a halt.

  I grabbed the square from his hands, tore open the foil package, and handed the condom to him. “You’re probably better at that than me.”

  When he didn’t make a move, I brushed my lips along his shoulder, slowly tracing the lines to his neck again as I created a warm path to his ear, until I was finally close enough to whisper, “I need you. Now, Colby.”

  His breathing picked up, the condom disappeared between us, and then he positioned himself between my legs as I squirmed against him. Almost desperate for relief. I held my breath as he eased himself into me, then slowly released it in a moan as he sank into me.

  I shuddered slightly as a breathy sigh released from his lips, and then we were moving, my hips lightly tilting, inviting him deeper.

  And with every movement, every touch, every sensation, I reveled in the fact this was really happening. And it was everything I’d hoped for…and more.

  Though we’d been drinking, and we were supposed to be “friends” in the morning, I knew right then that tonight would be a night I’d never forget, partly because I’d fantasized about it for so long, but mostly because I knew I’d never have another one like it. After all, there was only one Colby.

  Chapter 3

  Morning-afters. Twenty years on this planet and this was my first one resulting from a one-night stand.

  But everyone should have at least one, right? And, really, if I was going to eventually have one, Colby wasn’t a bad choice. Problem was, it felt like more. Like we’d made a connection.

  It seemed as if sex should be easy to walk away from, but intimacy…that was a whole other story. It’s like it found all the little fissures in my protective walls and seeped its way deep down, until it reached my core. And that changed everything. It took the person I wanted to be, tapped at that well-built exterior, then shattered it into a million fragments until all that was left was me. The real me was stripped bare of the friendship facade, and left behind was the vulnerable girl in love. And, truthfully, that was what I ran from this morning.

  When I slipped out of Colby’s bed early this morning
, I convinced myself it was to avoid Landon, and, well, to prove to Colby that what happened between us was no big deal. Just two semidrunk friends messing around. We didn’t need an awkward goodbye or a fumbling call-you-later. We could just move on. Friends. With a secret. Not benefits. Especially since I had a pretty strong feeling that it was a one-time thing. Chances of it happening again seemed slim. But did I want it to? That was a serious question that I’d have to ponder later, because right now my brain could barely process what had happened. Replaying the way he kissed me, and how his hands slid over my body…yeah. Bad idea. My stomach swirled with part excitement, part fear. All I really wanted to do was call Felicity, but it was too early to bother her and I had to start my shift at Eddie’s in an hour. Which was probably good for once. Best thing to do was busy myself with work.

  —

  “Isla.” Grandma turned in the kitchen, a coffeepot in one hand, a wet rag in the other. “I didn’t even hear you come in.”

  “I actually got home before you. I was in my room.” I made my way around her and popped open the fridge. Partly to grab breakfast, but mostly to avoid eye contact.

  “Oh, well, that must have been early—”

  “I work the morning shift. Wanted to get home in plenty of time to shower and grab breakfast.” I held up the yogurt cup. “Didn’t want to eat up all of Colby’s food.”

  “Was everything okay over there?”

  My hand hovered above the spoons in the drawer. “Um, yeah.”

  “Bien.” She turned back to the sink and rinsed the coffeepot. “It seems the rain was bad but thankfully the storm didn’t cause much damage.”

  My shoulders relaxed. “Oh yeah, there was no wind damage or anything like that.”

  She glanced back, gaze landing on my yogurt. “Let me make you a real breakfast. Maybe some papas con huevos?”

  No matter how old I got, Grandma was still Grandma. “Yogurt is fine.” I gave her a peck on the cheek as I passed. “And if I wanted potatoes and eggs, I’m perfectly capable of making them myself.”